Hi Guys! I just want to say how thankful I am for the outpour of love and support from all of you. So many people have told me how proud they are of me and honestly, it feels amazing that people took the time to read what I had to say in my first blog post so from the bottom of my heart, thank you!
This post is going to be a lot more personal just because I told myself that this blog would be kind of like my diary and because I also want to share more of myself with you guys.
Yesterday, I had a conversation with my boyfriend, Trevor that really made me think about the way I see myself and life in general.
I’m very nervous about even writing this post because I don’t know if it’s something I want everyone to know about me (especially people I see every day) but I’m going to write it anyway because fear has always been a huge part of my life. It sucks to say that but it’s true. Ever since I was younger, I’ve always been afraid of most things; animals, people, change, you name it. I’ve always been afraid to make big decisions, take big steps and do things without worrying about what people are going to say so I am going to write and post this as a step in the right direction of conquering my irrational fear of what people think.
Not many people know this about me but, I care a lot about what others think. Not as much as before, but I still care. I realize that caring is good but only to a certain extent.
There are lots of other things that not many people I talk to actually know about me. For example, I wish I could change a lot of things about myself. Most of these things are beyond my control but it doesn’t stop me from wishing that I could do something to change it.
I was talking to Trevor last night, just before bed and the topic of me not liking something about myself came up and it ended up with me telling him why I didn’t like this particular physical feature of mine and how everyone else’s was better.
Trevor proceeded to tell me how it’s just a part of me and that I’ll have to accept it eventually and move on because there’s nothing I can do about it. That might sound a bit harsh but it wasn’t intended that way. It’s one of the many things I love about my boyfriend. He doesn’t sugar-coat things just to make me feel better. I want to be with someone who isn’t afraid to tell me things the way they are, without worrying about hurting my feelings all the time. The truth is sometimes bitter but we have to hear it in order to grow up and right our wrongs.
I wanted to share this in the hopes that someone learns something from it. I also want to share it because I agree 100% with what Trevor said and our conversation made me realize that at the end of the day, there are some things you just can’t change about yourself regardless of how much you hate it but it doesn’t make you any less beautiful.
I have quirks and flaws but so does everyone else. I’m not perfect but then again, no one else is. I realized last night that I need to start embracing myself because all my little quirks and flaws are what make me who I am and they set me apart from everyone else. God loves me unconditionally, the people that matter most to me in my life love me the way I am and that’s all that matters.
A Little Appreciation Post
Trevor, you are my best friend. There isn’t a day that goes by that I’m not thankful for your presence in my life. The joy I feel because of you is overwhelming and I just want to say thank you for loving all the things that I like and dislike about myself, thank you for loving me even while I’m still learning to love myself, for motivating me to be the best version of myself and for encouraging me to live my life without worrying about things that are so trivial. I love and admire you more than I can say, thank you for being you.
Guys, I just want to conclude this post by saying that everything about who we are makes us unique and we need to make a conscious effort to start embracing all our imperfections because at the end of the day, I am perfectly imperfect and so are you.
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